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#CareerCounsel: Don’t let office behaviours get you down

Written by Chris Cox | Dec 3, 2015 2:16:42 PM

There are times in our career where we might not always see eye to eye with a colleague. Perhaps you share different ideas about your department goals or you feel you just don’t gel on any level whatsoever.

Never jump to the conclusion “it’s not me, it’s you!” For this #CareerCounsel entry, we are looking at how you might improve office relationships and why it’s important you gel with every colleague; even if it is only on a professional level.

We are hesitant to refer to this as a personality clash. It would be very hard for one person to change their personality to suit a colleague. As we like to resolve problems, here’s how you can address certain behaviours that might get you down. 

Do they respect my input?

One reason you might feel like disassociating yourself with a colleague as much as possible is if you feel there is no respect for your ideas. What can you do to fix these feelings and get to the bottom of the problem? Communication is important, so it really wouldn’t hurt to ask for constructive feedback for your input. If a one on one conversation can flow, it means there is understanding between you and your colleague.

Why not explain that you would prefer more conversations like this to ensure you remain relatively on the same page. It gives you a chance to voice what you can BOTH do better to ensure a better environment for everyone else. Who knows, it might turn brainstorming into a great collaborative effort.

Try to deal with any conflict yourself    

If there have been repeated disagreements between yourself and a colleague, it’s going to get demotivating…for both of you. You don’t want to dread work because you have to work alongside someone you’re not working well with. Before you involve co-workers or managers, assess the situation.

You definitely don’t want others to feel uncomfortable by a disagreement between two people. Approach your colleague and ask when is good for them to speak. Acknowledge that you both clearly have differences of opinions at times and you want to work towards changing this. Ask what you can do differently, and explain how you think they could approach the issue. If a problem is voiced, it’s likely they will want to work towards a resolution before it is voiced any louder.

Always be polite

If you feel like a colleague is approaching something in the wrong way, and maybe even being rude about it, be polite to them. Rising to the behaviour will make the situation escalate pretty quickly. As we said, your colleague might not know the way they act is affecting you so raising your voice might lead them to think they are being attacked.

So, be polite and once again address the issue in a calm manner. 

A quick assessment

  • To work out if it is just a problem between you and your colleague, have a look to see how they work with other colleagues. Is any type of behaviour different?
  • Feedback plays a big part again. Without alluding to why you are asking, see what your colleagues have to say about working with you. Explain you would like honest and constructive feedback as you want to strive for a great work environment.
  • Always focus on your job. Yes, having a good work environment is important but getting your work done is the top priority. If something is making you so uncomfortable that your work is being affected then perhaps it is at this point you do need to confide in someone else. If you need to speak about a colleague relationship that is really affecting your ability to focus, a one on one with your manager should be arranged immediately.

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